A Break From Our Scheduled Programming, Part One

21Sep08

These are the sorts of things that go through my mind after two drinks and a lot of websurfing at 1 AM, and I realize this is an older issue, but I’ve never dealt with it publicly in any of my web presences, so you get to deal with it now.

I could do with never hearing, seeing, or knowing about the slang term ‘va-jay-jay’ ever.again.  I’m not one of those people what finds genitalia to be sacred, and I don’t buy the whole reclamation of words thing–I think yoni sounds immensely ridiculous when used in a modern context, for example.  I have been known to use words that are Not Very Nice in regards to people’s bits.  And I recognize the problem that there is not a slightly dirty but acceptable slang term for women’s bits in the first place, definitely not anything comparable to ‘dick’ or ‘cock’.

But for FUCK’S sake, ‘va-jay-jay’?!  Can we find the person who came up with this in the first place and kick hir face?  My research indicates that we can blame the popularity on Shonda Rhimes, who wrote the Grey’s Anatomy ep it was in first.  And then Oprah was like O HAI THIS IS CUTE.  And the peeps at Cosmopolitan went with it, and…girl power!  The power to call our body parts by ridiculous cutesy names!

Okay. I’m sorry, I’ll break it down.  It sounds really fucking moronic, not to mention juvenilizes women, and we don’t need more of that shit; we already get that all the bleeding time.  And here we are doing it to ourselves and just letting it go by.  Also not to mention that it’s totally cool to say ‘va-jay-jay’ on national television or on the cover of magazines that are right there by the checkout at the supermarket, but god forbid anyone say the word vagina or vulva.

I mean, seriously, let’s all go around saying “wow, he has such a cute pee-ni-ni.”  I don’t see ‘How To Care For Your Pee-ni-ni’ on the cover of Men’s Health or GQ.  Ever.

Fucking christ.  It’s a dealbreaker for me.  Use ‘va-jay-jay’ in a non-ironic context and we are no longer friends.  Full stop.



7 Responses to “A Break From Our Scheduled Programming, Part One”

  1. Also not to mention that it’s totally cool to say ‘va-jay-jay’ on national television or on the cover of magazines that are right there by the checkout at the supermarket, but god forbid anyone say the word vagina or vulva.

    Exactly. This cutesy names turn Vagina into a “dirty word”. We have created these pet names because ultimately we have constructed the female genitalia as foul and dirty. A more pro woman move would be to reclaim vagina and loudly proclaim its usability in all spaces.

  2. 2 Callie

    I hate that ‘word’ too. It sounds stupid and babyish and I could slap whoever came up with it.

  3. 3 mzbitca

    To me it’s another way to remove the actual vagina as a women’s body part. If it’s your va-jay jay than it’s like an accessory, a little poodle you carry under your arm. Something that’s cute and fun but is not something important that should be taken seriously by society. Renee is right when she talks about how it makes the word vagina scary, something only crazy feminists with their radical ideas, talk about. Why else would it be insisted that it not be allowed to be spoken in high school plays or have the play be changed to the hoo-haa monolouges .

  4. Adding fuel to the fire is that Rhimes had to coin it b/c the network felt that the word “vagina” had been used too many times, in which I believe the same episode used the word “penis” about thirteen. Personally, I like va-jay-jay (I love having a variety of words for using interchangably in my daily lexicon, but that is MHO), but I totally see why other’s don’t. It makes me angry that it had to be used to cover someone’s squick factor over dirty girl parts on a fucking medical drama show when you can say “penis’ all willy nilly like that. The fact that Cosmo and others think it’s so cute makes me more angry when I think of why Shonda Rhimes felt she had to use it.

  5. I saw its usage on Gray’s Anatomy to be a bit more ironic – the character saying it is a bloody doctor, she knows what it’s called and wouldn’t be afraid to use it, one assumes – but the way it’s been picked up as a serious appellation … ew. It’s a dealbreaker for me too.

  6. 6 UnFit

    It’s vulva.
    Vagina only refers to the insides.

    Vulva. Vulva. Vulva. Vulva.

    Sorry, I just had to get that out of my system. I’m all for calling parts by their proper names, but vagina is not the whole thing.

  7. Renee and mzbitca: Yeah, that was my general feeling about the whole thing. God forbid we be dirty…

    Callie: You slap, I’ll kick!

    Ouyang: Well, that just adds fuel to the fire. Yours truly has a whole rant about the FCC, network censors, and their massive bullshit pile of bullshit, but that’s another post.

    QoT: Yeah, I sorta guessed it was–I don’t watch Grey’s as House is enough med-drama for me–but then people ran with it. Ew.

    UnFit: Augh! I always get forgetful when it comes to that specificity, personally. Cheers!


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